Consulting the good book.The "Vital Spark", Para handy's famous puffer.My looooords!! Get into that seminar!A good flail never hurt anyone.A cask on-stillage at a beer festival.What a lovely pair.  oooh-er missus!Oak casks are the way forwards...A jug being used for what they're made for!

       

Last Updated : 05/04/10

earn some gibber from this gen sheet and soon you'll be ranting at normals and bellowing at dreadful Berts and Adas with other hellfire desperados whilst bottling up for your cartel, getting the gen to avoid being withered, flagging the rancid battery acid and stick shakers but still getting bowled out by a shambles at the shack as you're a claiming insect with flaky gen and no baglet... or something vaguely along those lines.

Any rail bashers reading this may suspect a common source for many of the quotes - and you're right!

< Some Examples >

 

Word Meaning Example of Usage
Ada The female equivalent of Bert, generally of advanced years. This Ada is dreadful!
Aston Fan Club Any number of normals who shriek and/or shout a lot in a manner reminiscent of Aston from Sheffield. Bloody hell, this pub's holding a meeting of the local Aston Fan Club!
Aston Syndrome Strange affliction that makes people you once were best mates with turn into complete tossers and not speak to you ever again for no apparent reason. I see those cocks at the **** **** have got Aston Syndrome with us now, too!
Baglet Nubile young female. There's some top Baglets here!
B.A.G.S "Beards and Guts Society", the scooper's alternative name for CAMRA. I bet that bloke's in BAGS!
Battery acid Cider.  Or battery acid for a car, it's the same thing. Rancid!  That's not beer, it's Battery Acid!
Bellow Shouting / waving your arms around during a seminar or at something funny / outrageous, or generally creating a riot! Dreadful!  Bert's having a right good Bellow!
Beast A good scoop can be described thus. What a total Beast!
Beige Phil Phil Booton, the well-known Manchester scooper. Here's Beige Phil!
Bernard Common term when speaking to someone whose name you don't know.  I think this comes from Bernard Cribbins although I'm not sure... Alright, Bernard?
Bert Another name given to any person whose name is not known, but usually older men. My Lords!  check out this Bert!
Bible A timetable; this dates from diesel bashing speak but is still heard today.  Can also refer to the Good Beer Guide, but only by those who think something that out of date and irrelevant is a bible... I suppose they've got a point there, it is like the real bible... Who's got a bible?
Bosh Drinking a scoop in one or very quickly.  Made famous by Frostie of Ispwich. Bosh!  No respect!
Bottle Usually means a plastic bottle filled with beer by a scooper for later consumption. How many are you going to Bottle?
Bottle swap The process of swapping bottles with other cartel members. The cartel are doing a Bottle Swap!
Bottle up To transfer beer from a glass to the bottle for swapping / later consumption is called Bottling up. I'm going to Bottle up this one!
Bowled out If you go to a pub and the scoop you required has gone off, you are deemed to be bowled out. Cheers then! The Pictish has burst and I'm Bowled Out!
Boycott When a brewery (or beer) isn't drunk even if required due to ethical reasons. That's Boycotted!
Burst A beer that has gone is said to have burst. The Roosters has just Burst!
Butcombe Stout A mythical brew which Aston claimed he had at Peterborough and still reckons he did, even though Simon Whitmore of Butcombe denied ever brewing it!  Part of scooping folklore now. Butcombe Stout is on?  That's a total claim!!!
Cancer huddle The groups of normals who hand around the door of a pub smoking whilst blocking the entrance to everyone else as they "smoke a fag"; twats. I'll have a look in the DBA if I can get past the fucking cancer huddle!
Cane ‘em in To scoop a load of winners. Time to Cane 'em in then!
Caped Either you're withered, or you've drunk enough beer and can't continue scooping. I can't drink any more, I'm totally caped!
Carnage Usually the result of a whole load of scoops being drunk in quick succession. Did you see that Bernard after Nottingham?  Pure carnage!
Cartel A group of scoopers who bottle for each other in order to accumulate a higher tally. Leader's left the Cartel!
Cask-mod Refers usually to pub "house beers" which are created by modifying a single cask of beer - for example, the addition of dry hops or spices. That HB's a bloody cask-mod or I'm Bernard Cribbins.
Cellar run The fetching of scoops from the pub cellar by the landlord. Not many pubs do this so if they do, it’s a treat, don’t take it for granted! Sal's doing a Cellar Run! Dreadful!
Cheers then! Exclamation of disgust at something bad that has just happened.  Cheers then! The Fisherow's gone on!
"Cheery Beery" When someone is overly enthusiastic about everything and never offers a negative opinion, even of patently shite stuff. Archers is decent beer?  You're way too Cheery Beery, sonny.
Ching Money. I need a cashpoint, that festival has taken all my Ching!
Ching Out To pay for something. Who's Chinging out then?
Chung If you get ripped off - for example, buying a half of Bryncelin in the Brunswick - then you've been Chung! How much?  Fuck me, I've been well Chung !
Clag Sediment in the bottom of a bottle. This bottle's full of Clag!
Claim! Often heard when someone utters some "dud gen"! Butcombe stout is on now?  CLAIM!!!!!
Claimant Someone who decants a load of flaky gen. That Bernard over there is a right claimant, he says Butcome Stout is on next!
Claw-back Scoring a beer which has been around for years but you've either forgotten or neglected to scoop before; a bonus scoop! Dreadful, this Roosters is a Claw-back!
Clear up To drink and/or bottle all the scoops you "need" at a venue. I've Cleared Up here, I'm off !
Clown Someone who is pretty stupid. That's dud gen, you Clown!
Cover To see what is on; to cover a pub is to see what’s on sale. Who's going to Cover the Fat Cat then?
Decant Decanting the gen is telling it, basically. Decant the gen !
Desperado Someone who is desperate for scoops. That bloke with the trolley is a right Desperado!
Desperate A person who is very keen to get as many new beers as possible, by whatever means, is usually classified thus. Gary Mess? He's Desperate!
Dip List A list at a beer festival that states how much beer is left in each cask. Who's seen the Dip List?
Dodgy Means that a beer is a suspected rebadge. This beer is well Dodgy!
Doss Sleep. Let's get some Doss then / No Doss!
Dreadful The opposite to usual; dreadful means something is good, or rateable. Dobbins beers?  They were Dreadful!
Dud Gen Information that is blatantly wrong. Who's decanting Dud Gen?
Euroscooping Beer ticking done outside the UK. I'm off to Sweden to do a bit of Euroscooping this weekend!
Farce When something doesn't go to plan. The train is caped? What a total Farce!
Fest Shortened version of "beer festival" for those too lazy to speak the Queen's English (!) Where's this Fest then?
Fester Usually refers to waiting at a station for a train, although it basically means waiting for something (for example, a pub to open or a train to arrive) with nothing to occupy yourself. Just missed the unit to Stalybridge, we've got a huge fester now!
Flag / Flagged To not drink a beer that you require on purpose due to reasons such as it's dodgy, rancid or you boycott the brewery.  Comes from Basherspeak when, if you decided not to board a train, you were taken to be giving it the "right away" flag.  Maybe. I'm Flagging Butcombe stout, it's well dodgy!
Flaky "Flaky" gen is untrustworthy for some reason, as opposed to "solid" gen. That's totally Flaky gen!
Flap / Flapping If you're worrying about a beer still being on when you get somewhere, this is termed to be "flapping", or you're in a "flap". Don't flap, it'll still be on!
"Flat Earth Society" Those scoopers who think that the ticking world ends at the shores of the UK, much like those in olden times who thought that you'd fall off the edge of the world if you went too far! Japanese beers are crap?  You've not even been so what the fuck do you know, Flat earth society veg!!!
Fly-by When you quickly stick your head into a pub on the way past just to see if anything worth ticking (or drinking!) is on the pumps. I'm off to the Marble via a fly-by of the Angel.
FM See "Foreign Muck"  
FOAD "Fuck off and die".  Not unique to scoopers, but a very popular quote! FOAD, normal!
Fodder / Fodd Food. I'm dying for some Fodder!
Foreign Muck Term used for any beer not from the UK, this apparently originated from Pogo. "Czech beer?  That's foreign muck"!
Fudger Someone who lies about the scoops they have had.  Not to be confused with Fudge, a top man from Tamworth. Bert?  He's a bloody Fudger - he claims to have had Butcombe stout!
Future-proofing When someone is "future-proofing" they write down everything they do - such as trams, planes, London underground chocolate machines - just in case they start scooping them in the future! It's planes now is it?  I suppose you're well Future proofed!
Gary Mess Shambolic scooper who pulls along a Heath Robinson trolley laden with bags for life, bottles, pens, jugs... it's like being sat with a bag lady! Here's Gary Mess!
G.B.B.F CAMRA's national beer festival, although it's usually taken to mean "Greenhouse Boring Beer Farce" as it was held in a giant greenhouse at Olympia for years and is now in an underground car park somewhere in London. I'm not going to the Greenhouse Boring Beer Farce, it's a pile of shite!
Gen Information. Got any Gen on the Alex?
Gen Sheet A beer list or internet printout which contains valuable beer gen. Who's got a gen sheet?
Gibber When someone is talking crap! Butcombe stout is on?  That's total fucking gibber!
G.O.B.B.S "Genless old boring book of shite", although I think it actually means something else officially.  If anyone knows, let me know... ;-) Don't look in GOBBS, it'll only decant dud gen!
Going blind When you go to a pub/festival not knowing what to expect in terms of new beers and nothing to do with deterioration in eyesight whatsoever. I'm going blind to the Brunswick tonight.
Going for (It) Say you find out that a huge beer you require is available somewhere; you may decide you want to scoop it in and so storm off to cane it in - this is termed "going for it". He's Going for that new Rooster's beer in the Water's.
Hanky Wavers Morris Dancers I see the Hanky Wavers have produced!
Hellfire An utterance of pleasure, or can mean a beer is very good. Have you tried the Dobbins yet? It's bloody Hellfire!
Horrendous A shedful of scoops! Have you seen the list?  The scoops are horrendous!
House beer A beer allegedly made for a single pub (or chain) which is generally either a rebadge or cask-mod. Any gen on what this house beer  is?
"In the Book" To get a scoop in the book means you've drunk it - it's now written in your scoops book, basically! That's another 20 winners in the book!
Insect Someone who has little gen and is disliked by most scoopers.  They generally buzz around those with the gen. You're an Insect!
Keith A taxi, after the late Keith from Stalybridge - who drove a taxi. Yo! Keith!
Ker-ching! Noise made by scoopers when a beer is excessively expensive (for example, at Parson's Green or in the Brunswick), usually grossly exaggerated for maximum impact, sounding like an old-fashioned cash register! How much?  Ker-chiiiing!
Large A rare beer could be termed thus. That winner is a bit Large!
Leap This means to get off a train in order to have a scoop whilst en-route somewhere else. I leapt at Derby for the Pictish.
Les Something that isn’t very nice is said to be Les, or more often rancid. This beer's bloody Les!
"Line in the book" Adapted from Basherspeak, this simply means a scoop - imagine you're underlining the GBG like people used to when it actually did contain (most) of the existing beers! This one's a line in the book!
McSpoons Wetherspoons, so called after their alleged similarity in service and/or quality to the fast-"food" chain of a vaguely similar name. Are we flagging McSpoons then?
Mess Drinking loads of winners and being pissed up makes you a mess, especially if you are a state too!  Not to be confused with Gary Mess. You bloody Mess!
Militant Usually the refuge of "Old School" scoopers who have become hardened and cynical about the hobby and regard everything new as slightly suspicious, leading to boycotts! You're a right Militant old bastard, aren't you?  Top man!
Mini-Aston The name given to an electronic device such as an iPaq or PDA simply because Aston was the first to use one. Dreadful, I see you've got a Mini-Aston now!
Mix A blend of 2 beers to produce a new one, usually for ticking purposes. Is this house beer a Mix?
Move To get somewhere, you do a move. What's the Move then?
My Lords! Exclamation of greeting, or when something amusing happens. My Lords! I need 7 scoops here!
Need If you "Need" a beer, you've never drunk it before; it's a winner. I Need that whopper!
New A scoop; a new beer That one's New for me!
New Face A new scooper who is not known by the old hands is thus named. Who's that New Face?
NO DOSS!!! Screamed at someone who's just fallen asleep, usually due to an excessive intake of scoops. NO DOSS!!!!!!
No Respect Usually uttered before launching into a load of winners. No Respect! Bosh!
Normal Any person who’s not a scooper Boddies is nice? What do you know about beer, you bloody Normal?
Old School Scoopers who remember the times (early 1990's) when times were hard and very few winners were found - so those who were scooping then really had to earn their ticks!  Generally cynical, militant and "sneery beery". He's Old School!
Outrageous Good. This beer is outrageous!
Pivo The word for beer in Czech (and other Slavic languages), used mainly by Euroscoopers when talking about any beer.  Pronounced "peevo" in case you didn't know... I fancy a Pivo!
Plastic Keg beer is often termed thus; also anything which isn't "real" or "traditional" can be called plastic, such as a refurbished pub, pasteurised beer, HDPE and the like. Have you seen the Guildford nowadays? Well Plastic!
Present Occurs during a seminar, when the presentees indicate the presented by gesturing with their hands. < example > It's seminar time!  Get this Bert Presented!
Quartering Sharing a half pint with another scooper in order to scoop more beers per session - you can then tick four beers per pint drunk!  Bernard and that other geezer are Quartering their beers.
Quoting / Quote To deliver information on something. Eh up, Bert's quoting some gen about the Beer House!
Rake 'em in To score a shed-load of winners in one go. I Raked 'em in at the Marble!
Rancid Pretty terrible! (or a top ska/punk band) This beer is rancid!!
Rate If you rate something, then you like it.  Ratebeer is something completely different... I rate this pub, it's hellfire!
Rateable A rateable beer is either a rare one, or simply a quality brew. Get some Roosters in, the stuff's mega Rateable!
Raus! German for "Get Out", often shouted at normals when they are gibbering around in a pub doorway and generally getting in your way. Come on you veg, Raus!
Real If a beer is "real" then it's cask - keg beers are usually termed "plastic". Is that Porterhouse Real?
Rebadge When a beer is renamed with the intent to pass it off as another beer so scoopers will drink it. This house beer's a blatant Rebadge, allegedly!
Required If you haven't drunk a beer before then it's said to be required by you. Butcome Stout?  I Require that, it's a whopper!
Riot Not social unrest, but something which is rather hellfire or rateable. That tram route up to the castle in Praha is a right Riot!
Roadshow A "posse" of scoopers going around together getting the winners in. Here comes the London Roadshow!
"Room Beers" Bottled beer bought from a shop when abroad to bump up the day's tally of winners when you return to the hotel after a day out on the scoop! "Right then, get these Room Beers in the Minibar and let's get some winners in!"
Roverbrain An affliction which manifests itself as stupid or unpredictable behaviour when out on scooping trips, for example forgetting where you are.  It's more common when you've been away for a few days with little sleep, too much beer and a surfeit of unhealthy food.  The word comes from basherspeak. What do you mean, Butcombe Stout is on somewhere in Inverness and you're going blind for it?  You've got roverbrain, sonny!
Saint Brendan Reverential name for Brendan Dobbin, the man who basically introduced the UK to American and other exotic hops (along with Sean Franklin) and, along the way, ran the best British brewery ever. This beer tastes like it's inspired by Saint Brendan alright!
Scoop A new beer; a winner. That's a Scoop!
Scooping The occupation of drinking winner beers. Time for some Scooping!
Scooper Someone who records the beers they drink. I reckon Bert's a Scooper!
Seminar A group of scoopers acting to the camera due to something that is either funny, a shambles, or rateable; e.g; Bratley dossing out at a festival.  <example> My lords!  join in this top Seminar!
Shack The train station. Where's the Shack then, Bert?
Shambles When something goes wrong, it’s deemed to be a shambles or a farce. Train's caped, what a bloody Shambles!
Shave it! Shouted at those with bizarre and unnecessary facial hair. Oy!  Weirdy Beardy!  Shave it!
Sheep A scooper who follows others around without coming up with ideas or moves of his own. Stop following me, you Sheep!
"Sneery Beery" The opposite of Cheery Beery, taking this line means that you're a right cynical old bastard who thinks everything is crap and/or dodgy... which is generally the way things are! As you get older you get more Sneery Beery!
Solid Type of gen - "solid" gen is reliable, "flaky" or "dud" gen is not. Bert's gen is pretty Solid.
Spinning If you are rushing around in a flap scooping beers in, you are said to be "spinning". Dreadful, he's Spinning!
State Someone can be a state by being pissed up, or can just be a plain state! How many winners have you drunk, you total State?
Stick Shakers Morris Dancers. Cheers then - it's a bunch of fecking Stick Shakers!
Stillage Scaffolding or other device that casks are placed onto at a beer festival. What's up on the Stillage?
Storm When you storm somewhere, you get a move on; from Basher's speak. Time to Storm off then!
Taunting Pole The place - generally a pole or stick - behind the bar where the pumpclips for the beers on next are displayed, taunting you as you can't scoop them (unless you blag a cellar run!).  Thanks to Katja Mallinson for this one... Cheers then, there are some right whoppers on the taunting pole!
"Techno-scooper" Phrase coined by the Girlie Show when Pogo and Loaf starred on it; taken to mean someone who uses a "mini-Aston" excessively! You're a right techno-Scooper!
Tick A scoop; a new beer. I just ticked a Roosters beer !
Tick list The scooper’s list of beers he’s had. I've forgotten my Tick List!
Ticking The occupation of drinking winner beers.  It's a contentious issue as to if ticking and scooping are the same thing or different aspects of a similar activity. Let's get Ticking!
Tipped If a cask on the stillage is tilted then it's termed thus and should be scooped ASAP as there's not much beer left in it! How many are tipped?
Top Man Someone who's had loads of winners, or who has been around for years, is usually referred to thus. That's Bert, he's a right Top Man!
Top Move When your travels net you a load of scoops, you are deemed to have done one of these. Manc to Stockport then onto Preston?  Top Move!
Trolley Wheeled contraption used for transporting bottles by cartels. Leader's Trolley has burst!
Trolleytubbies The cartel, as all 3 pull shopping trolleys around to carry their winners. Eh up, it's the trolleytubbies!
Veg Demeaning insult. You missed that huge scoop, you Veg!
Veg Stout Veg Stout is the famous minging scooper from Crystal Palace who should be avoided at all costs unless you want your nostrils poisoned and to be gibbered at incessantly. Bloody hell, let's go - Veg Stout is on his way!
Vegged To be pissed up. Dreadful!  Bert's Vegged!
Whipped Up The state where a scooper is very excited as something good has happened. Dreadful! The Roosters has come on and Jonesey's well Whipped Up about it!
Whopper Large winner; a rare beer. That's a bloody Whopper!
Weirdy Beardy Usually refers to a CAMRA person. Check out the state of this Weirdy Beardy!
Winner A scoop; a new beer. Get them winners in!
Withered If you go to a pub and the beer you wanted has gone, you are deemed to be withered. Cheers!  That's me Withered then!
Worzels Cider drinkers View these bloody Worzels!
Yo! Keith! Shouted at taxis in a manner made famous by a certain Mr Garside. Yo! Keith!
You've Gone! Quote made famous by Aston, refers to when someone is withered or pissing themselves laughing. Hooo Hooo!  You've gone!

 

Some Examples of Lingo being used.

 

Quote: Dreadful, Bernard's bottle has caped! It's decanted battery acid everywhere! what a state!

Means: Oh dear, that person's beer container has ruptured! There seems to be cider spread liberally around the location, and he's very much the worse for excessive alcoholic consumption.


Quote: My Lords! I'm chinged up by this dreadful beerlist, but I'm still in bosh mode and I'm going blind to cover the Alex for the dodgy mixes!

Means: My word! The excellent beer menu has consumed all my liquid assets.  However, I still have spare capacity for libating ale so I will make my way to the Alexander Arms even though I don't know what beers will be available except for some house beers I have suspicions about.


Quote: I'm withered! my bottle supply is burst owing to the dreadful amount of scoops on the stillage! I'm going to have to give it some "no respect"!

Means: Oh dear! I seem to have filled all my beer takeouts as there is a surfeit of beers I've not tried before collected together here.  I think it will be necessary to drink the rest quickly.


Quote: That weirdy beardy deserves a bellow, but view that baglet, she's dreadful!

Means: The gentleman with the facial hair needs to be verbally abused, although the young lady in attendance is rather nice.


Quote: Cheers then, that veg gave us dud gen! There's no winners here. Who was that new face, anyway? Let's storm off and cane in some whoppers on a desperate leap!

Means: Thanks a lot! that dim-witted person has furnished us with incorrect information and there seem to be no beers we haven't tried previously in this location. Does anyone have any information as to his identity? It would be advantageous for us to quickly leave and to acquire as many beverages of rare proportions as possible whilst having limited time to consume them.


Quote: Dodgy! this stuff's a blatant rebadge; we need some solid gen whether it's a winner or it's dud.  Who's going to blag Bert for the gen? 

Means: Unfortunately this beverage is plainly another with an altered name. Consequently, furnishing ourselves with reliable information on it's correct attributes and source would be advantageous to our cause. In order to acquire this information, a member of the party is required to engage the barman in dialogue in order to procure this knowledge.


Quote: Beast! That normal is a mess and has dossed out! It's seminar time! Bernard, you present that sack of coal on his head and let's have a bellow! he'll be withered when he wakes up, and all the normals will view him and think he's a total state! My lords!

Means: Excellent, the gentleman here seems to have fallen asleep through excess alcoholic consumption. I spot an opportunity for an excellent photograph recording today's events for future merriment. You there, whose name I do not know, if you would place the prop in position and indicate it to the camera, and the rest of us will proceed to arrange ourselves around the scene and indulge in high jinks. Presently, when he has awoken, he will be most displeased to find himself in the situation and consequently the ordinary customers witnessing the scene will certainly think less of him as a citizen.  Hurrah!


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